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Monday, November 16, 2015

Crime Correctives

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Will I be struck by a neon light? A dictionary? A bible? The intangibles of crime, like a bright feather dangling over a small head, cast a lurid pall over each citizen’s life.

To help the police identify the assailant’s voice during a homicide, a recording device will now be implanted inside the nasal passage of each citizen.

A camera rigged up behind the citizen’s left eyeball (to photograph the assailant’s face) is rejected as too expensive and impractical, as it can easily be dislodged (by said assailant) with a spoon or a finger.

Facing an indecent assault, a citizen is advised to befoul his/herself by biting a plastic pouch tucked beneath the tongue containing a rancid solution.







[I think the above is in my first collection, All Around What Empties Out. It was written around 2002.]



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